My Journey to the Mommy Club: A Letter to the Women Still Waiting

To the Woman Still Waiting to be Mommy,

Hi sweet lady. It has been on my heart to send you this message. I want you to know that my heart still aches for you and I haven’t forgotten you. One thing I know is that I always will hurt for your story of infertility because your story was my story.

I feel your pain and I know your heartache. I understand the thoughts that keep you up at night because I had them too. I know the doubts and the anger and the fear. I have seen the baby announcements on Social and have been reduced to a pile of tears. I know what it’s like to feel like your heart will never heal from the pain and the heartbreak. To question your worth as a woman because you cannot do the one thing that your body was designed to do. I know all of that hurt… I also want you to know something…

Sweet woman, you are loved. Yes, you are loved by people but more important than this imperfect and earthly love, you are loved and adored by God. You are loved by the same God that hung the stars in the sky and told the sun to rise. That same God loves you more than you can fathom even on your best day. Sweet woman, whether you are a believer or not, there is a God that loves you and has a plan for your life. He has a plan for your life that is perfect. See, one thing I learned on our journey is that my humanly scope of what I see is so tiny and finite. I see just this one tiny piece of the whole picture. God though, God sees it all and I promise you, with every cell and fiber in my body, as sure as I am typing these words, that picture you only see a tiny pixel of, is a masterpiece more beautiful than anything you can imagine. Our God is mighty and he is powerful. The same God that parted the Red Sea has counted every hair on your head. You are loved sweet woman and there is a plan for your life. None of this is happening by chance and there is a purpose for it all. Trust in the Lord, sweet woman.

I pray for you everyday. I pray for your path and your journey and most important, I pray for your walk with Christ. I pray that you are open the possibility of being at peace with your infertility journey. I know that might seem callous, rude even, of me to suggest peace in a time of pain and sorrow, but here’s the thing… During my journey, my people prayed peace over me. They prayed I would find peace and purpose in my journey. Crazy as it sounds, somewhere along the winding way, I did. It was that peace that made all the difference. So sweet woman, know that you are prayed for everyday. Know that your pain and your sorrow aren’t in vain. Most important, know that there is a God that loves you and he has your back and he is in complete control of your infertility journey.

Love, Dez