Kinda Uncertain. Kinda Anxious.
Sooo anyone else out there kind of shell shocked right now? Maybe feeling a little uncertain? A little anxious? I am, uhhh, asking for a friend…
Full-disclosure, the responses that I seek answers to aren’t for a friend, they are for me – but I am sure you already figured that out.
Guys, can I do some real talk in this judgement-free zone?
I have been in triage mode and high-alert since Wednesday. I am fearful. I am anxious. I am tense. My tummy is in knots and I have a constant headache. I don’t think I have taken a deep shallow cleansing breath in a week. I am starting to get addicted to the pop-ups on my phone notifications with all the breaking news. Hubbz family in Italy has kept us in the loop of the situation there and we knew for weeks what could potentially be coming our way. It’s enough uncertainty to make a human go a little cray-cray. I kinda wanna grab myself by the shoulders and shake me and be like “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, GIRL! SNAP OUTTA THIS AND PULL IT TOGETHER!” But also, I kinda wanna go in my room, pull down the black-out shades and sleep this Coronavirus-induced fear off. Wake me when it’s over please… the first option of tough-self love didn’t work and the latter is not a feasible thing, so here we are…
Anyone else feel the same?
Sweet readers, what do we do when the world is uncertain? What do we do when the fear is gripping and we are feeling more wrecked than worshipful? What do we do when all the breaking news is breaking us?
What I realized this week, amid a flurry of group texts, is that now, more than ever, it is imperative that we seek Truth.
When I talk about Truth, I am not talking about whatever news outlet you trust or what social media platform you deem worthy of your attention. I am not referring to your social circle of friends and family (though they can be amazing and helpful and wonderful). What I am referring to is Truth that surpasses all understanding. Truth that is steadfast and unwavering through the ages. Truth that embodies peace because of its mere existence.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Jesus Christ.
The truth in Philippians 4:6-7 hit me like a ton of bricks and then, if I can be honest, it made me facepalm so hard. You guys, I have spent the week so wrapped up in the emergencies of the days that I forgot to hand it all over to the One who created the day. I don’t know who else needs this reminder today but even through all of our uncertainty, God is in total control, and despite sometimes popular opinion, He is still on the throne. Read that last sentence again.
I am so unsure about the future and what it looks like but one thing I know is that now, more than ever, I must be vigilant about putting my trust in Him. We prepare for the unknown, we pray fervently without ceasing and then we fall into His Truth. Please don’t misunderstand me- this is not an easy task. Just because I offer this to you doesn’t mean it’s easy for me to ACTUALLY do. Full-disclosure? I will have a white-knuckle grip on that truth in the coming weeks because as soon as I say I trust, worry is right behind it- I’m human like that. Here is the one thing I do know about trust- the more we fall into the cadence of trusting Christ and His Truth, the more and more we end up trusting Christ and His Truth.
Sweet friends, take these words and store them in your heart. Write them on a post-it and place them on your bathroom mirror, on your refrigerator and the lock screen of your phone. Meditate on them and trust them.
Don’t get weary, friends.
Even in total uncertainty.
He is God.
He is in control.
He is still seated on the throne.